I do not want my children to grow up in fear

I have taken the last 2 days to slowly process the events in Orlando. I grew up in Orlando, I lived 2 miles from the site of the shooting for the majority of my childhood. I worked at the hospital, in the very trauma center that many of the victims were brought to. I drove by that night club every time I went to work for seven years. I look at the footage of the scene and it is all very familiar, I lived much of my life in that area. It is all very real because the horror did not happen in some far off land, but in a place full of memories. 

How do I, as a person, but even more, a mother, not live in constant fear of the "what ifs." How do I raise my children to not be ruled by fear. I have been chewing on these thoughts almost the whole time I have been a mom, but even more in the last few days. 

I tend to live in a reality of being blissfully ignorant. Some of this is because, in this season of life, I live in a vortex of mickey mouse clubhouse and sponge bob, but some of it is by choice. I don't care to know all the evils of the world. I don't care to stay current on all of fox news. Some may say this is irresponsible of me, but for me, I feel that (other than praying) I can't do much to change the circumstances, It will do me no good to have all the details of the horrors of this world and I do not want to become hard and calloused into thinking everything is going to hell in a hand basket. We live in a fallen world. What I will do though, is try to raise a generation of world changers. 

My adult life, and the direction I took in it, was hugely impacted by one single event. If I had been ruled by fear the trajectory of my life would have drastically changed. When I was 13 I was dancing…it was a monday night in September. The dance school I attended was held in a church. That night, as we rehearsed a routine, I heard the scream that I have only heard a few times and hope never to hear again. The scream of a mother as her child's life is in eminent danger and close to death. My class immediately stopped and started praying. Suddenly, some people ran in and screamed, "does anyone know CPR?" I had just finished a babysitting course and was certified in CPR. I raised my hand. It was almost supernatural, I don't know if it was because everything was happening so quickly, but I believe it was because the Lord was with me and truly directing my steps. I (and my best friend to date) and one other friend, were dragged to the nursery room. The big brother had accidentally pushed a large playhouse over onto his littler sister. We immediately started CPR. I will never forget that night. I will never forget the 3 year old laying lifeless on the floor. I will never forget the puddle of blood  on the floor growing larger by the minute. I will never forget the sound of bubbles in that sweet babies chest as we performed CPR. I will never forget her little brown curls soaked in her own blood. I will never forget when EMS rushed in and shoved us to the side, we started praying and sobbing as I looked down at my hands and pink ballet tights covered in someone else's blood. I will never forget sitting on the couch later that night and my mom and dad, on either side of me, holding me, as they told me that sweet 3 year old did not make it. This was a defining moment in my life. As I sit here and write this with tears in my eyes it is not lost on me that, though this was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, God used it for good. As I processed that night over and over I remember always coming back to the idea that God called me to be a nurse and i KNEW if could do it because of that horrible night and the grace God gave me (and my friends) to fight for that little girl. I was not ruled by fear, but by hope.

I realize that God gave me the gift (or curse) of compartmentalizing. I can handle situations calmly and quickly and remove the emotions of the situation until a later time. That was a huge reason I was able to be a pediatric nurse for so long. As I process the events of the other night I keep coming back to the idea that we cannot be ruled by fear, but by hope. That one night was instrumental in instilling a feeling in me that fear is a real thing, but it would define me or what I could do. I want my children to grow to be wise, but I do not want them to wake up each day scared to go about their day. I don't want their decisions to be ruled by the fear of possible pain (whatever that looks like). I want them to be brave. This is so hard to say as a mother. I don't want my children to ever be hurt of be put in harms way, but if we are ruled by the fear of the "what ifs" we/they will never make a difference. 

Clay and I are very careful about what we allow our children to be exposed to, but we also don't want them to be so sheltered that they can't be effective to navigate this messy thing called life. We talked with the boys about what happened a few days ago. We told them that a very bad person made a very bad choice and killed and hurt a lot of people. We let them ask questions and sit quietly and ponder. Cooper, who is naturally a worry wart asked, "how do we know people like that won't come and hurt us?" I told him I didn't know, but I told him when we get that tingling feeling of fear or worry in our tummy we need to think, "is what we are doing wise," if the answer is yes, then the next question needs to be, "Is what I am doing worthwhile?" if the answer to that is yes, you do it. I told him to always pray when you feel scared or anxious, but don't let that rule your thought life. God has called us to make a difference and sometimes that is scary, but just because it is scary doesn't mean we shouldn't do it. 

As our family prays for the victims, their families, and the workers that will forever be changed by the events in Orlando, I will also be praying for my children to not live in fear of what could happen in this scary, fallen world, but that they would grow to be mighty, brave world changers that are full of hope and joy for all that God has in store for them. I will pray for you, to not be afraid, but to have hope.

The yes mom.

Whenever I start to think about a blog post I feel like its all a muddled mess in my head. So random and I jump around constantly….this blog post is still kind of muddled. I also feel like I always have to qualify every blog with "I am no expert at this life thing, just me being transparent about how I do this crazy life thing." 

I get asked a lot how I "mother" this zoo. All of my kids are crazy different..all of them, not one alike (that would be much too easy!). I vividly remember growing up thinking that, somehow, I wanted to have obedient and respectful kids, but kids with their own personalities that didn't feel squashed by what I wanted them to be. Then I married Clay….Mr personality. Now I have 5 very passionate, full of personalty humans. I mean, I can't even half the time! Now most of this parenting stuff is flying by the seat of my pants, but some of it is very intentional. The more kids I have the more I CRAVE order and control. I definitely think running a house full of humans requires an element of order, if not I would quickly be on the next episode at hoarders (I cannot lie, when I watch that show I feel like I totally have my act together!). We run a tight ship in this place. We have a schedule and rules and my kids know what is expected of them. With all that said I want to be the yes mom.

The longer I do this life thing the more I realize its not very easy. In my 33 years I've experienced some really hard and painful things, but in the grand scheme of things I live the dream. Even "living the dream" this adulating thing is hard! 

I feel like I have 3 "Megans" living inside me. 
- Pinterest Megan…the one that walks out the door (leaving behind a spotless, perfectly decorated house with a delicious dinner simmering in the crackpot), my kids are dressed perfectly, hair combed, matching shoes AND socks (my kids hate wearing socks…hence the stench that follows them if they wear sneakers), skipping to the car ready for the amazing crafty activities of the day.
- Apathetic Megan (probably the most dominant Megan)…I don't care…as long as all my humans are alive and have bathed in the last week I'm good! Apple squeezers are the fruit of the day and I wave as all the people stare and count. 
- In the middle…I try so hard every day to find the balance of the 2 extreme Megans.

As I try to find this balance I have realized that I want to be the yes mom. This means that Pinterest Megan is going to get squashed. EVERY.SINGLE.DAY I have to try and silence the pinterest Megan….If I want to be the yes mom I'm not going to sweat the small stuff. In our house that means you can pick your haircut. Dear Lord, 2 years of Cooper's signature haircut about did me in! Praise the Lord he decided to cut it today! It means my kids can pick out their clothes (other than Sunday and a few other occasions). I'm pretty sure Jude wore the same 2 pairs of shorts for 3 weeks straight (the pinterest mom may accidentally throw away said nasty clothes after week 3) and a felt red cape. It means BK can have free reign (in her designated areas) to craft however she wants. Good night….you have no idea you are a control freak until you try to do a craft with a kid….it might just kill you! Being a yes mom means, when my kids get money I let them pick what they want, 1 million pieces and all (the pinterest mom in me throws the whole shebang away as soon as so many pieces are missing its not functioning…when said child is not looking and it's stuffed in the bottom of the trash can never to be found again!). It means letting my little people pick what activity or sport they would like to do….even if I know they will probably be terrible at it. It means, letting my children help me cook…OMG, this one makes me hot. Like inside I feel like I'm going to internally combust! 

As I fight these Megans I remind myself that my children will have to adult much too soon. They will hear "no's" for the rest of their lives. I do want them to learn to work through things and problem solve, but honestly, their is a lot of time for that. I want them to be kids. I want them to remember being able to experience lots of things the way they want to. I want them to grow into who God wants them to be gently and happily. So every day, before I say no, I weigh if it really matters. If it makes a mess it makes a mess, it's just a good opportunity to teach them to clean. So, when I'm out and BK is wearing her black, knee high boots with cut off jeans in the dead of summer, just know I cringed, laid out 5 super cute outfits as alternatives and then let her walk out the door….this is why Rose will be dressed to the nines until she won't let me dress her anymore! The pinterest Megan will not be completely squashed!

They are all mine....

It is no secret we have a lot of kids. I understand that anywhere we go we tend to stand out like a sore thumb. I feel like we have been a spectacle when we only had 2 children (granted, they looked like twins so i guess thats why). Lately though, I feel like a circus side show no matter where we go. Maybe its because we have done a little more "touristy" things this summer or because Rose has developed a delightful screaming habit to get what she wants, Whatever the reason, Im having to fight more and more to keep my mouth shut. If you know me, you know this is not my strong suit. 

Let me start with this. Clay and I have chosen to have a large family. We feel like, though we are FAR from experts at this, we are doing an ok job. We recognize that we are raising small adults. We take this job VERY seriously. We want our children to grow into successful, generous, kind, hard working adults who make a difference in this world. That does not happen without constant training and talking and talking and talking. So, this means we take them out to dinner, or on their first airplane ride, or to Disney, or public or everywhere (I mean, I don't really have much of a choice.) Clay and I have decided that when we go most places where human interaction is required they are not allowed to have screens (don't get me wrong, we have a love/hate relationship with screens. Sometimes they are necessary for survival!). If we are eating out they need to talk to humans, if we are in the store interacting with cashiers I want them to look at them in their eyes and interact, if we are spending time with friends I want them to communicate with friends and not their screen. A child cannot understand how to interact with anyone, especially adults unless they are taught, so that is what we are trying to do. In a previous post I talked about behavior I expect from my kids, so, though they are far from perfect, they are pretty well behaved when we are out and about, and  someone is going nuts, you will probably see me running to the car, because I cant, like I literally sweat ugly sweats, turn red and start laughing (because otherwise i may cry), so we leave!

With that all said, I am used to the stares. It has gotten to the point where people, almost every day, point, count my children out loud, make the most absurd comments (I'll get to that in a minute), make terrible faces (like you would think I have boils on my face or am spreading the bubonic plague through my seed).  I don't even notice half the time anymore, but I did start to think the other day, how would a new mom with young children, who is already feels like she is probably failing at this parenting thing, feel if she was greeted with those horrid looks. She is probably already so stressed about getting on a plane with an infant, those looks will only add to the stress. The couple who can't afford a sitter AND dinner out so they bring their children, only to be greeted with an eye roll when said children make a noise louder than a whisper,  probably doesn't make them feel welcomed or relaxed. Trust me, when I go out without children the last thing I want to hear is another screaming human, but give that poor parent a little grace. I'm pretty sure they aren't enjoying that tantrum any more than you. I hear lots of complaints about children who are only able to behave with a screen and what horrible job my generation is doing with our children because we use screens as a babysitter (probably somewhat true) But, if we choose not to, and they make a sound above a whisper we get a look and feel like a failure. So, grace, just a little goes a long way.

So, as one friend to another, I'm going to give you a few dos and don'ts for when you see a parent with children, maybe a lot, maybe just one having a meltdown. Also, as therapy for me I'm going to list all the comments I've heard with the response I may or may not have said.

First, NEVER, I repeat NEVER tell a parent "they have their hands full." I would like to say "no sh*t sherlock." What do you even say to that (and don't say my heart is fuller….I can't, I just can't) If I had a dollar for every time I heard that I'd be a millionaire. It's like telling someone with a beet red sunburn, "oh my gosh, you are so burnt." No Duh!!!! Don't say it, just don't.

So for this fun game I will be "M" and the commenter will be "C." So here goes….

C - Wow, you do know how that happens right?
M - No, I'm not sure, could you give me and my children a tutorial, with visuals, right here in aisle 8!

C- Are all these kids yours?
M - No, I pick up vagrant children on the street and bring them with me to do fun things like grocery shop.

C- You guys must not have a TV.
M -  We actually do, but while we are on the subject, how is your sex life?

C- Are you catholic?
M - no, what birth control do you use?

C - Oh, so you couldn't get pregnant so you adopted that one and then you had your own.
M - No, my uterus works great, thanks!

C- Are they all from one dad?!?
M - no! I practice brother husbands….kind of like sister wives, but with husbands….

C - You sure are busy!
M - Actually I had all these children so that I can sit on the couch and eat bon bons while they do all the chores.

C - Your done having kids right?
M- No, we are planning on about 15 more.

C- wow, you're like the duggars.
M -actually, I have 5, not 19, you may want to repeat kindergarten and work on that counting!

C- your husband must make a lot of money to pay for all those kids. 
M- I'm totally taking donations if you are offering.

And one of my personal favorites, with my children walking with me…
C- If I had a wife that looked like you I'd make that many babies with you too!!!
M - nothing, I've got nothing.

So, when you see a parent out with children, struggling or not, and you feel compelled to say something maybe say, "you are doing a great job," or maybe, just maybe, my very favorite thing to hear " your children are very well behaved." Holla!!!!

Learning to serve.

Raising littles people ain't no joke. As I've said before their are days when I'm sure I'm failing at this, but that doesn't mean I quit trying. One of the things Clay and I talked about way before we even had kids was how do we make them servants. How do we help them to understand that this world does not revolve around them. For those of you who have kids, the minute they take their first breath their little brains know to do whatever has to be done to get what they want….um, have you ever met a 2 year old!

One of the things I love about having a lot of kids is that, no matter what, you learn to defer to others…like, you have no choice. In our house that means enduring, I mean listening, to Bailey Kate sing, constantly, in a high pitch, monk like chant (because she just sings what she is thinking, not an actual song).Because it makes her happy the boys are learning to "happily" endure the noise. It means letting one brother use the only boogie board we own while you wait patiently and cheer him on. With a lot of humans in the fam we get lots of opportunities each day to "think of others as more important than yourself." Y'all, this is not easy, it's a lot of talking and definitely does NOT come naturally to my selfish humans, but we are making some progress.

Last night we had the opportunity to serve dinner to some friends in St Augustine who don't have homes. Clay and I want to teach our children to work and serve. One GIANT IMPORTANT aspect that we want to teach our children through serving others is that we are no better than anyone else. We are so immensely blessed to have all we have and by the Grace of God there go I. We are no better or different then the friends we serve, we are not better then them because we are serving them. We have been given SO much we do not deserve that we are happy and thrilled to bless and share a meal with others. Now, kids are way cool in that they don't naturally have these thoughts, They do however have NO filters! I definitely had to discuss with them that some of our friends may look different, smell different, speak differently, but you are not to say anything about their appearance (Cooper Nettles!). I have learned to prep for the worst with my children from experience. You know, that time BK asked the server at Steak'n'Shake, whohad a mouth full of gold teeth, if she "got those at my daddy's jewelry store, because they are super beautiful and i need some" Or the time Cooper, in front of his entire class, while giving a presentation, told his teacher she needed to buy a perfect pedi because "she had really dry feet." I mean, really, I can't even prep for the ridiculousness that comes out of my children's mouths!

Ok, so back to last night. My heart was in a mommy melted puddle watching my children. I realized that they were teaching me. They did not bat an eye. They put on their gloves (I mean who doesn't love dr. gloves when you are a kid), asked how they could help and got to work. Bailey Kate was in charge of passing out tortillas, with a bit of her added charm and sparkle, Cooper and Cole were in charge of lettuce and cheese, Jude was in charge of helping me dish out fruit salad. We also went with some other friends (who had 5 kids also….I mean, we had this serving thing on lockdown with all our humans), once we realized our friends couldn't carry all the food, all of our little people would ask, "can I help carry that to your table?'" As I watched my little 4 year old carry these sweet people's food to their table and just chat it up like they were best buds, I was literally a puddle. They did not see a broken person struggling with all that daily life throws at them, he just saw a friend who needed help bringing food to the table who liked to talk about who their favorite super hero is.

We are slowly learning this parenting thing, but I think, if we can continue to point our children outward and to help them RECOGNIZE needs and bless and serve others we will see a generation of world changers. One thing my parents taught me, and I am striving to teach my children, is being kind is great, being generous is awesome, but it's not really a sacrifice unless you are giving something of yourself or of your possessions that you will have to go without. If you can't feel the "loss" it's not much of a sacrifice. It also may mean we may need to get a little uncomfortable or step out of our nice clean bubble. This kind of goes against what it is to be a parent. We don't want our children to feel loss. We try and provide for all of our children's needs, but if we can teach them to be truly sacrificial, imagine the joy they will have in their life. Instead of constantly worrying about what they don't have or what they want or how they can get what their friends have they will live a life helping others find joy which, I think, is the most amazing feeling ever! I am still learning this, because, let's be honest, I really suck at it!

How the zookeeper keeps the zoo

I've been asked by a few people lately about "How you do it" with 5 kids. So, though I FAR from have this parenting thing down, I figured I'd share a few tips on how I juggle 5 kids in public. 

I think the most valuable thing I have gained being a mom of a lot of kids is to stop caring about what other people think of you. When I only had 2 or 3 kids I was always worried about people watching me and judging my parenting style. Once I had a couple more kids I realized people are going to judge or have their opinions no matter what. We literally get stared at wherever we go, good behavior, psycho behavior, cute baby, no shoe Jude, screeching…i mean singing BK, perfect obedience or tantrum throwing. It doesn't matter, we get stared at and hear all the comments all the time…"do you have a TV," "do you know how that happens," are they all yours," "are you catholic?" You name it, we've heard it! With all that said, we have all learned to laugh and keep walking. Let people think what they will, stop caring and enjoy your people. 

So a few tips for herding the humans in my zoo…

-I read a book a few years ago called "The Power of Positive Parenting." Game changer! One of the most valuable things I read in that book was something along the lines of, children are uncivilized creatures. They don't come out knowing social norms and acceptable behaviors. It's our job to teach them. If we constantly say no, they will know what NOT to do in that situation, but they will not necessarily learn what TO do in a situation. So, if you come hang out with me at any given time, before we get out of the car I will run through what I expect.  It will sound something like this. 
Mom "what kind of behavior do I expect?
kids "Good behavior."
Mom, "Are you going to yell in the store?"
Kids, "no."
Mom, "are you going to run away from me."
kids, "no"
Mom, "are you going to ask for things or whine?"
Kids, "no."
Depending on what we are doing I may add a few.

-Now, this little trick I learned from my momma. If my kids start acting crazy we LEAVE. Like walk away from your cart, gather psycho children and LEAVE the premisis! This may mean dry cereal for dinner or scavenging for leaves in the backyard because you left the toilet paper in the cart, but do it. I have done it once, now my kids know, they get crazy, we leave. One of my favorite things is hearing the older kids tell the younger ones when they start to feel the "urge to surge" "guys, mommy will leave and we won't get anything, don't be naughty!" 

-Now, inevitably someone is going to lose their sh*t at some point. ALWAYS. The key. Keep your cool. Though I may feel like I'm going to internally combust inside I use every shred of will power to keep my cool when my child is trying out for the exorcist in the middle of aisle 8. I try to calmly tell them that they have one opportunity to calm down and obey or we will leave. If they don't comply I pick their flailing, demon possessed self up, tell the other children to follow (to which no one tries anything crazy because they see the fire in my eyes) and we go to the car. Then once said demon child has calmed down, we talk through their psychosis, and whatever pre determined "discipline" was decided before we went into that poor establishment is, we carry out. JUST KEEP CALM. Don't give the judgers anything else to judge.

-Another little trick is sticker charts for the younger 
kiddos. I wrote a blog a while back about this. These work AMAZINGLY! Little ones tend to forget some of the expectations, so if you go through them and they have a goal to work towards it is golden. For some more detailed info on this you can look here. http://thenettleszoo.blogspot.com/2013/06/back-in-saddle-and-behavior-charts.html?m=1

-Since our little people have been really little we require that they either hold onto the stroller or cart or whatever human cargo carrier we are using. We don't chase kids. It's not a thing. If they run away, we leave. We really have never had much of an issue with this. I don't know if that's because we've done it since they were tiny or what. Our kids have probably figured out we don't chase people. If they want to run off, go…no one is following (stellar parenting for the win!). So now, especially at places like Disney it's not hard to keep tabs on everyone because everyone stays close.

-We also work REALLY hard at teaching our kids to think of others as more important than themselves. So, some people may get stuff sometimes and others don't. We have learned to prep the kids before if we know this scenario may happen, but even if we don't, this is life, you throw a fit, we leave. 

-Lastly, enjoy your little people. They are super cool and pretty fun. I have always parented with the philosophy that I want my children to be obedient and respectful, but I still want them to be kids. That means they are going to be weird and silly and say the most ridiculous things at the most embarrassing times, but thats ok. Enjoy this (I know this is easier said than done!). 

So, because I have put this out there, the next time I see any of you my kids will probably be acting crazy, I will be sweating, someone will be pooping and another will be without shoes, but hey, real life…Just know I'm not judging a one of you in this crazy thing called parenting….may the odds be ever in your favor.

Restart

So, if you walk around with me and the zoo for any period of time you will hear "you have your hands full" or something along those lines. I usually just laugh it off and keep moving. The more I hear the more self control I have to use to not say "thanks for that captain obvious!" 

As annoying as that statement can be I was feeling all the weight of "having my hands full" at the beginning of this school year. I'm not sure if it was adding another little human to the chaos, or just life. I felt myself waking up in the morning not wanting the day to start because all I could see was the unending to do list. I felt like every day was a weird kind of groundhogs day. A million tasks, all very much the same as the day before, but still a heavy weight on my shoulders to check them off the list. With all that I had to accomplish in a day I felt like if I accomplished one thing I was failing at another. I would end my day falling into bed thinking of all the things I missed, messed up, or just completely failed at. I realized I was trudging through my day with a scowl on my face, snapping at my little people to "hurry up," "just focus on your task and finish," or "just do it, I just want to be done." I felt myself with my shoulders hunched in stress and literally viewing the sweetness of my children and time I spend with them as a task. I was viewing this season as a task to check off my list….and then I would feel like an even bigger failure.

I used the Christmas break to reflect on all of this and the ache of failure and stress that was weighing me down. I felt the Lord impress on my heart over and over, "I will equip you for what I have called you." I started to feel my shoulders relax and the pressure and my to do list lessen its weight. Though none of my circumstances changed, none of my tasks lessened, I definitely didn't have less children, I felt a rebirth of sorts. I felt like I had rediscovered the joy in my mundane. This doesn't mean anything got easier per se, it just means I was reminded that in this super short season of life (or any season of life) I have to daily take a breath and remember what is important. I still like order and a clean house, I still have to do school with the kids, and nurse a hungry baby, and exercise so that I can stay healthy and take care of this zoo, I still have to cook dinner, and etc, but I AM ENOUGH! My savior has equipped me for which he has called me. I AM ENOUGH because what I can accomplish in a day is not where my worth is found. My value is not determined by what I can do, but what my Savior has done for me. 

By God's grace I have been able to rest in this season. Oh the joy I have found. The sweet snuggles of my children. Watching my children learn. Making my home a place we all want to be. Their are many days where I start to feel the pressure of the days tasks, but I literally say "I am doing the BEST that I can do," take a deep breath and move on. This probably means when you see me some, or all of us, will look a hot mess, or when we climb out of the car things fall out with us, but hopefully you will also see a big smile on our faces.

I write this as a reminder to myself, so that when I start to feel overwhelmed I will remember to take a breath and CHOOSE joy. I also write this so that you, whoever reads this, whatever stage of life you are in will know that YOU ARE ENOUGH! You are right where the Lord wants you. What will you choose, will you choose to wake up tomorrow with the weight of the day and all you MUST do, going to bed replaying all the ways you have failed? Or, will you wake in the mooring and CHOOSE joy, joy doesn't mean jumping out of bed singing and dancing (BK might do this on the ergs), but it does mean resting in where God has you and remembering that He has equipped you for what He has called you today! Rest in this hope and joy!

Stepping out of my comfort zone.

So, today I did something I swore I would NEVER do...I competed in my first crossfit competition. I cannot lie, it was HARD. Going in my goal was to not come in last....I came in 10th out of 19 (although their was a Hope Solo and Hellen Keller so it was probably out of 17, but who is splitting hairs here!) Apparently the way to get me to do things is to make me swear I never will, and then I will (hence a few half marathons and natural childbirth). As I was mentally preparing myself for this competition and struggling through the feelings of not wanting to look like a complete idiot and completely failing I had to do a little self reflection and self talk.

I HATE trying things if I know I won't be good at it. Having children has been the biggest push for me to analyze my behavior so that if their are things I need to work on, I work on. I want to be a mom that is an example to my kids. I want them to know that if they work hard they can do ANYTHING. They may not be the best at it, but they can be better than they were. I don't want what they "think" they can do to define them. I want them to embrace hard work. I want them to fight to be better at all they do. I can't hold them to that standard if I don't hold myself to that, so today I pulled a FREAKING car and about died doing 3 other WODS. Where did I observe people trying and failing and trying and failing and they still kept trying....my siblings.

I'm 1 of 5 kids. What some of you may not know is that 3 of my 5 siblings have some learning struggles. I grew up watching both my brothers and my younger sister struggle at most of the things they attempted. I watched them be made fun of because they were usually last or close to it. I watched them fight to learn and do things that came pretty naturally to me and my youngest sister.  You know what else I watched, I watched them try NO MATTER WHAT! They didn't let their learning struggles define them. They didn't let the scoffers deter them from at least trying. They are AMAZING! They go into each situation holding their head high, trying as hard as they humanly can and then, be proud of what they accomplished, but not only that, they are the most loyal and encouraging humans on the planet. If they are in your corner you will have a cheerleader for life. I want my kids to be just like them. I don't want them to be so prideful (like me) that they don't even try. I want them to set a goal and reach, no matter what! No matter if they are going to come in last....I want them to TRY. I don't want their circumstances to define them, I want them to define their circumstances, just like my siblings do!

Today I competed with my younger brother Adam. The first WOD he had never done a movement at the weight that was required. That didn't stop him....he muscled his way through and finished that WOD like a beast. The second WOD was a movement he could barely lift at 55 pounds that morning. We worked on it together for a while and he had a personal best of 85 pounds 3 times. He pulled a giant truck and pushed through one of the most challenging WODs I've done in a while. He may have came in last, but he is the very BEST in my book. Adam, you are my hero and I had so much fun with you today!

Now I am going to go pass out.

Self Worth and Raising Girls

So, a few months ago I had my first big moment of feeling like, as a parent, I was failing. Now, I regularly feel like I am royally screwing up this mom thing, but this moment was different. Bailey Kate had come downstairs and was checking herself out in the mirror. Since my girl could find her reflection in anything she would stop and admire what she saw. I was worried I would have to figure out how to make her not so narcissistic because she LOVES herself, but I realized on that day a few months ago I was doing damage, I was leaving scars. Let me back up...

I remember the moment I became aware of my size and how it related to other people. I was in the second grade. I was in the hallway at school and my whole class was being measured and weighed for field day. I was the last in line. I remember playing with the girl in front of me without a care in the world. I remember she got weighed and measured and then it was my turn. I weighed 70 pounds. I don't remember what the other girl weighed, but it was less than me and she said "woah, you weigh more than me so you are fatter." That was it, the moment I started to let my size affect my self worth. This has been a life long struggle, fighting the feeling that the way I look defines who I am. No matter what size I have been I have always wanted to be thinner. I, too often, let how I look rob me of my peace and joy and I don't want that for my girls.

So, back to that day. I watched BK look in the mirror expecting the usual hair flip or the hilarious chat she would have with her reflection, but this day I saw her turn to the side, suck her stomach in and ask me, "mom, do I look fat?" ugh! A punch to the gut!!!! My sweet, care free, confident, self loving little girl was looking at her reflection and not liking what she saw. What made it even worse was that I knew she had heard me ask that question. I knew that she had seen me change my outfit multiple times and hear me mutter under my breath about how fat I felt, or how she would hear me say that I didn't want to eat something because it would make me fat. I was part of why my girl asked this question.

In this culture so much worth is placed on outward appearance. If you got your information from our culture you would quickly see what we as a society put value on is how you look. So, as a mom of girls how am I going to raise these treasures to realize that no matter how God made you are valuable! In that moment as my heart broke I realized I can change this. I called her over and hugged her tight. I told her she was beautiful and strong and healthy. I also said that us Nettles girls don't ever ask if we are fat, we ask if we look strong and healthy. I smooched that girl and sent her on her way.

I immediately purposed to NEVER comment on my size or how ugly I felt that day. I purposed to NEVER speak of food or exercise as the enemy. I have been super blessed with a husband (and parents) that NEVER make me feel like my size matters at all. He makes me feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, I know he loves me for so much more than what I look like. I want this for my girls, but in order to find a man like this, especially in this oversexualized culture, they have to know their worth is not defined by their appearance.

In the last few years I have purposed to not let my worth be defined by outward things, and I have to teach my children this. I have taken active roles to help with this. I think it is important to feel good about yourself and to take care of the body God has given you. After Jude I started running and doing Crossfit. I continued Crossfit through my pregnancy with Rose. Though I still would love to be thinner I know that I am strong and healthy. My kids come with me every day to the gym and watch me sweat. They watch me take this time for myself to be HEALTHY and strong. BK watches me. Bailey Kate begged me for months to start crossfit and after her little mirror incident I couldn't get her there fast enough. The other day she came up to me after a class and said, "mom, I look super strong don't I?" "yes, baby girl, you look super strong!"

My prayer for my girls, and goal in this crazy thing called parenting, is that they would realize that they are not valuable because of how they look or how smart they are. They are valuable because they are made in the image of Jesus. They are valuable because they are kind and generous and patient and gentle and strong. They are valuable because they were made to make a difference in this world and love others. I want them to know that their mommy and daddy and brothers love them NO MATTER WHAT! I want them to never struggle with how they look because they are so confident in the person God has made them to be.

Me and my beautiful baby girls

Side note: I want this all for my boys to, but I think it translates a little differently for girls in this day in age.

For those of you who think I have it all together

So, occasionally people will tell me they think I'm amazing, or super mom or have super powers. I'll be honest this makes me kind of anxious because it couldn't be farther from the truth. Having people put me on a pedastool makes me really nervous because the pain associated with falling off the pedastool when I disappoint said people is no fun....so, to avoid this pain altogether I'm going to give you a few examples of why I am most definitely NOT super mom!

• Today at Crossfit I couldn't figure out why Rose was screaming throughout the WOD. She is usually happy to sit in her car seat and observe, but not today. After I finished I picked her up thinking she was just hungry, but no....she, and her car seat, were covered in sh*t! I,  dripping with sweat, picked her up and took her to the car to get her cleaned up (all while my 4 year old was roaming freely around the gym, with no shoes). Of course I couldn't find any wipes so I did what any normal person would do and took her to the bathroom, washed her in the sink and dried her with paper towels (sorry Bobby). Most normal people would head home and clean the car seat and such, not me!!! I put a paper towel in the car seat and headed to target! 
• My 4 year old loses his shoes on the daily. I don't mean at home, I mean like drops them in random places never to be seen again. Most moms would make sure he had shoes when leaving places, but somehow this slips through the cracks most days. Instead of heading home and getting more shoes I've given up and he just goes barefoot. So, when you see him out with nasty jiffy feet you'll know why!
• I feed my children chemical filled, processed Ramen noodle soup at least once a week...and they LOVE it!
• I've given up on dressing my kids. I used to dress the boys in adorable matching gymboree outfits almost everyday when they were younger (thank you Nina). Now I'm happy if everyone has underwear on! For example, Jude's favorite outfit these days is blue and orange checkered pants with a red and blue striped shirt....totally on point!
• I fully intended on having the kids have Bible time and a separate reading time at least 4 days a week this summer....we've done that ONCE, I repeat ONCE this WHOLE summer.
• We paid a sweet, unassuming young man to detail our car this week. It took him ELEVEN hours!!!! It doesn't take that long to clean my house!!! Poor thing had no idea my children concoct disgusting creations and dump them in every crevice they can find. 
• If I take my children grocery shopping half of the food is opened because I'm trying to keep children quiet. It's a fun game for the cashier to see if she can find which bags will spill everywhere and which ones won't.
• I have a  house cleaner that comes every other week (God bless her!!!).
• Jude peed in the bed the other night. Instead of sweetly changing his pj's and remaking his bed I stripped him down, threw dry pj's at him and threw a blanket on the floor and said goodnight.  I was just happy I remembered to wash the sheets the next morning.
• My 4 year old was bellowing for me the other day and called me "mom butt face," very sweetly of course!
• I LOVE dumb reality tv and am HORRIBLE at making myself read. 
• I LOVE babies and HATE teenagers...this is going to present a problem very soon!
• I love wine, coffee and bedtime.

I could go on and on, but I'll spare you all. I hope this makes anyone who feels like they are failing at this mom thing feel a little bit better. I will say in the short, almost 8 years I've been doing this, I have learned to not sweat the small stuff. Some days are easier than others, but it makes my days more enjoyable if I can sit back, take a deep breath (or 20) and laugh. I mean seriously, if I've kept them alive for another day I feel like I've accomplished a goal for the day! Just remember, this isn't a competition, we are all doing the best we can and wine, their is always wine!

Teaching My Children To Fail

So, I know this title may sound weird, especially coming from a mom who should want her kids to have the best and not feel pain or sadness, but lately I've been thinking a lot about this. The idea that I want my children to be "good" at failing. You may be asking, "what does that even mean?!" Well, this is what it means to me...

It actually means a couple of things to me. First, I think in todays day in age we work a little too hard at making everyone a "winner." Like I said before, this is hard as a mom, but I don't want my kids to always win. If they are "winners" regardless of their effort what is the point. I have 5 children, they are all VERY different which means some are better at things than others. For example, Cole tends to be more athletic than Cooper. It's no secret to either boy that Cole is more athletic than Cooper, but instead of either not making a big deal about Cole's accomplishments athletically so we don't hurt Cooper's feelings, or trying to make everything "fair" (which means Cole doesn't do his best) so everyone is happy, we have chosen to talk about it. We noticed that Cooper would evaluate if he could win, or be the best, at the activity we were doing and if he felt like he couldn't he wouldn't even try. I get this, I do this! I don't want him to live that way though. I want him to try, I want him to work, and I want him to fail so that he will learn that it's OK! We want to teach our kids that we are not all good at everything.  This doesn't mean that we don't work super hard to be the best we can be at what we set our mind to, but it DOES mean, even if we didn't win or we weren't the best we cheer on those who did win or who are the best. This is life. It's been interesting to watch, recently I heard the boys chatting in the backseat. Coop told cole, "you are better at karate than me, but I'm better at spelling. That's ok! I'll help you spell better and you can show me some karate moves." My heart seriously melted!!! That's what I have prayed for, see the benefit of having someone "be" better than you, you don't have to be unkind or jealous to make yourself feel better, you can encourage and learn from them! I hope this teaches them that when they are adults they MUST work hard to get what they want, but they must also be kind and gracious. I want my kids to be each others (and others) biggest cheer leaders. I know some people say this could make them push overs, but I think it is the opposite, I think it will make them amazing leaders.

This leads to my second reason I want my kids to be good at failing. Being raised in a large family without a lot of discretionary income we learned really early that just because one of us got something doesn't mean the other was going to. My parents took it to another level, we not only didn't get what the other person got every time, but we needed to be happy about that! I think this comes easier to some than others. I so appreciate my parents instilling this and TRAINING us in this idea. I'm pretty sure my mom would let one of us get a "treat" and not the others to train us in how to respond correctly. She would say "guys, we are going to rejoice with those who rejoice." I didn't understand when I was younger what this meant, but I do now! This is hard for me because many times one child will get something at the store or as a gift and it's just easier to say "ok, whatever" then it is to say, "no,  today Jude is going to get something and not you and we are going to be happy for them," and deal with the subsequent tantrum. We are practicing this a lot lately (feel free to stare if you see me with a screaming child in target). I want my kids to learn that this world does NOT revolve around them. This means if Jude gets something, you work really hard at being happy for him. You're time will come, you lack for nothing, you will learn to be happy for others and not immediately think "when is it my turn?" I think this will serve them well in relationships as adults. I hope as they grow and as we "practice" this, my little humans will grow into the kind of people that love and encourage well, are grateful for what they have and not always looking at what others have and want it, or walk around with a scowl on their face thinking about how "life isn't fair." They'll know that, yup, life isn't fair and that's ok!!!

Celebrating "just" Jude at his disco dance party...that's a whole other blog post!!!!

PukeFest at the Zoo

If you have ever wondered what a stomach bug looks like in a large family, wonder no more! I'm not sure if it is the fact I was a pediatric nurse for 7 years (you were lucky if you got through a shift without some kind vomit escapade) or you just have to find humor in the disgusting our you'll cry. The last few days we had the delightful plague of the stomach bug at our house which we refer to as PukeFest. I've decided, for your entertainment, to share with you the less gory details of how a PukeFest plays out at the zoo. I'm going to give you a run down of how each one of the people in my family is unique....in how they puke. If you have ever had a sick kid or been around someone who is sick you find out that everyone pukes a little differently.

Clay- (he seems to have come out unscathed during this pukefest) Clay yells, like really yells. I asked him once why in the world he was so loud and he said he feels like if he yells while he pukes it will come out faster and therefore end sooner. I'm not sure if that is true, but everyone knows if he isn't feeling well.

Me-I'm sure I am the perfect puker =) Although, last night Jude had made his way into my room right as I felt the urge to purge. He took one look at what was happening and ran...faster than I've ever seen him run! Imagine the torture of puking, but also having the urge to laugh thinking about the thoughts running through my 3 year olds brain.

Cole-When Cole pukes picture the exorcist. While spewing he is yelling things like, "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?!?" "MAKE IT STOP!" "WHY IS THIS HAPPENING." It's super hard not to crack up at all this drama.

Cooper-envision a roaming dog. He gets on all fours, circles the area he's puking in and leaves his mark. Really not the most effective way of puking and trying to catch the moving puker to have him puke in a bowl is also pretty comical to watch.

Bailey Kate- Ironically BK is our best puker, gets up, pukes in the toilet (very quietly I might add), flushes the toilet and goes back to bed. She's SUPER needy in almost every other way, but she's a champ at puking.

Jude- I'm not sure if Jude's method of puking is because he is the 4th or it's just his technique. Jude usually sits up in bed, pukes somewhere on his bed then lays back down and goes back to sleep. I find this VERY disgusting and VERY convenient. Disgusting because cleaning up fresh puke is bad enough, dried puke is even worse, but let's be real, he didn't wake me up and I got a full night sleep.  During this last puke fest though he walked into my room to tell me he was going to puke and puked right in the doorway. As I said before,w I had the stomach bug too so I as not about to get up and clean that mess up. Clay was downstairs sleeping on the couch. He would have gladly helped, but he is a DEEP sleeper and the thought of walking downstairs to wake him up seemed like entirely too much work. So, what did I do, just cover it with a towel, tell everyone to jump over it like an obstacle course and I'd clean it up later. Disgusting yes, survival at its finest!
Rose- we'll see, currently she just opens her mouth and lets the goodness flow.

I'm sure you now feel like you have a better understanding of how this zoo works and you are also, now, feeling a little queasy yourself. You're Welcome!

Geneva Rose's Birth Story

So, this post is mostly for me. Let's be honest, being that Rose is the 5th child the likely-hood of me getting around to putting together a baby book before she is 30 is slim to none (I just made a photo book of Jude's birth and he is almost 4!). I've decided I'll blog Rose's birth story and one day we can put it in her baby book. So here goes....

I was due with Rose on March 30, but that date was "chosen" based on my 7 week ultrasound and not my cycle. My whole pregnancy I was convinced the date was wrong and my first due date of March 18 was the correct due date. Rose's pregnancy was, by far, my most challenging. I had morning sickness (mine usually came in the afternoon throughout the evening) for 16 solid weeks, I had horrible food aversion and random nausea the whole pregnancy, and never got the second trimester burst of energy. That coupled with raising and homeschooling 4 other kids definitely was "character building."

Three weeks leading up to Rose's birth I had been having contractions, as soon as I was about to call my Dr they would stop or lessen significantly. They often happened at night which did not help the already existing pregnancy induced insomnia. So, Tuesday night , March 24, I laid in bed at 9:30 and started having pretty painful, consistent contractions. At this point I was convinced I was never going to go into labor and the plan was I would just be induced that Saturday. So, I laid in bed...annoyed! I fell asleep about 10:30 and woke up to very painful contractions at 12:30. At 2:30, still having contractions 3-5 minutes apart I decided finding a babysitter at 3 am would be so annoying I would just try to go to sleep and deal with it in the morning. I woke up again at 5:30 with more contractions until 6:30, went back to sleep till 7:30 waking up with contractions that felt like braxton hicks contractions, still regular, but not strong. I was irritated, but this had been happening for weeks. I got up and got ready for the day. That particular day our cleaning lady was coming (I'd gladly skip a meal a day so I can pay someone to clean my house every other week!). The only problem was I have to get all the kids out of the house until 2, because it's pointless to have the mess makers hang around while the house cleaner is here.....as effective as brushing your teeth while eating oreos. So, I sat on the couch to make a plan while Clay loaded the car. I must have looked like death warmed over because Clay walked in and said, "I'm texting Davis (my Dr. who is also a family friend which sounds weird, but is actually awesome!). I said no way! The contractions aren't bad anymore and I don't want to use up all our childcare (my parents live 2 hours away and my Mother in law was in Israel) only to get sent home. Clay insisted and texted our Dr. He called back immediately, I told him about my night and he said that I was clearly in early labor and since I was planning my third VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) he'd rather me come in and be monitored than continue at home uncertain of my progress. I was SHOCKED! I have always gone in for inductions because my kids won't come out (I wouldn't either if I heard the craziness I was about to enter). I didn't have anything set up, I hadn't even finished packing my hospital bag! But to the hospital we headed.

So we pull up to the hospital. At this point we hadn't secured babysitters and I didn't want to use up all our help if I was just going it get sent home. You know you are having your fifth when your husband drops you off at the hospital curb and drives away. When I got to L&D the nurses asked me who was with me. I responded "nobody" not realizing how crazy that sounded. I then said, people are coming, just later...that didn't really change the shocked look on their face. I got hooked up in triage and was still having fairly consistent contractions. My Dr called and said to admit me and we were going to have a baby! Again, I was shocked! Clay dispersed children and came up a few hours later. I also called my mom and my best friend who both lived in Orlando, but were going to be with me for the birth. 

At about 1pm they hooked me up to pitocin and told me to walk because somehow the little stinker had "disengaged" and Davis didn't want to break my water until she had re-engaged. Now, my plan was, if I went into labor naturally I would try to have her without drugs (because at my ultrasound 5 days prior they said she was no more that 7 pounds 11 ounces). If I had to be induced I would get an epidural...well, I went into labor naturally, but needed to be helped along. Now, I had a c-section with Cole and epidurals with BK and Jude, I think they are AMAZING! You don't get a medal for having a baby without drugs, and as long as you get that human out of your body you have done your job and are an awesome mama! I just decided that because we aren't planning on having any more kids I wanted to give it a shot. And since she was supposed to be my smallest she was a good one to try for! Well, my mom knew (being that she has done this 5 times naturally) that if I really wanted to do this I needed a plan and a code word if I REALLY was serious and wanted an epidural. I had done crossfit until I was 8 months pregnant and one of the biggest things I learned was when heading into a really challenging WOD the only way to be successful was to have a plan, so, as crazy as it sounds I approached my labor as the worst WOD I'd ever do. My plan was once Davis broke my water I would labor for 2 hours with the hellish pitocin contractions and if I was 8 cm I would continue.  If I was less I would get an epidural. Well, Davis broke my water, I labored for an hour and a half with the help of my mom, Melanie and my sweet husband (who was completely against me doing this naturally because he can't stand to see me in pain). I got checked and was 7cm so I decided to keep going. That's when it got real. Holy cow, the contractions I had ever felt before were nothing compared to these. I found that the louder I got the less in control I felt (I love control) so ended up laboring sitting Indian style, rocking back and forth, and counting silently in my head until each torturous contraction was over. At about 6:30 I was convinced I needed to push, they checked me and I was only 8.5 cm. I labored for what felt like 10 hours (15 min) and I felt pressure so I called them back in...9cm. At this point I was done! I remember yelling "this hurts so effing bad!" Poor Clay was pacing and Melanie and mom were at either side gently coaching me through. I remember talking to myself in my head (after my mom said it) that holding still for an epidural at this point would be almost impossible and it probably wouldn't work, so I buckled down. I called one more time thinking I needed to push...nope, 9.5 cm. 

After, I have no idea how long, I all of the sudden had the uncontrollable urge to push, when I say uncontrollable I mean I had no control and I started pulling my moms arm off as I pushed. Clay ran and got Davis and the nurse. At this point I had "cried wolf" 3 times so they kind of mosied on in, the nurse checked me and yelled to Davis "the head is coming out!" Oops. Davis looked at me and said "stop pushing!" He was feverishly throwing on is gown and gloving up, but I couldn't stop! He finally got dressed and sat down, I pushed through one more contraction and Rose's head came out. At this point Davis must have realized she was huge because he made me stop pushing and wait for the next contraction to push the rest of her out. Let me just say, I have a new appreciation for Johnny Cash's song Ring of Fire. I remember thinking, "you are a grown-ass man (excuse my french) pull her OUT!" My next contraction came, he had to flip her and she was out. I remember hearing "She is HUGE!"  I also remember looking up and realizing my room was full of people, like at least 10 medical staff. The saying is true, in the throws of labor you could walk a marching band through my room and I could care less as long as you get that baby out. They laid Rose on my chest and I got to do skin to skin for a good hour. She was perfect! Tiny button nose,  white hair, and FAT! 

Geneva Rose Nettles entered the world on March 25 at 7:38pm weighing in at 9 pounds 8 ounces and 21 3/4 inches...like I said, I'm pretty sure she we was 1 week late based on those stats. All in all, that was BY FAR the hardest and most painful thing I have EVER done, but I'm so glad I did it....though I never want to do it again =)

 Meeting my girl for the first time! Pretty sure she is giving me the stink eye for what I just put her through =)

 I think she was as shocked as we were at her size!

 First picture with mommy and daddy.

Geneva Rose

My friend of 19 years who was a huge help getting me through labor!

Mimi (and a huge support always and through labor!) with her second grand girl

Trouble!!! 

 First picture as a family of 7!!!

 This boy loves his little sister

 Heading home outfit, Bailey Kate wore this dress home and the sweater was knit for Diane because she thought her firstborn was a girl.

 Heading to the zoo!!! It's about to get real!

One of my favorite pictures! I couldn't imagine doing life without this man.

Thanksgiving 2014 redneck style

This year for Thanksgiving we, along with my side of the family, decided to go camping. Now, if you know us at all you know we are always up for some adventure. The beauty of being 1 of 5 kids and your best friend's family (who we "vacationed" with often) being 1 of 9, not a whole lot scares you. Yes,  the idea of all the laundry, packing and the fact it would be freezing was a little intimidating, but we've decided to never let that stop the memory making! Well, this year was quite the experience.

If you know my husband at all you know he loves the extreme. If you're going to do something you may as well do it big! A few weeks ago he told me his jujitsu instructor had been raising turkeys and he wanted to get one, slaughter it (by himself) and eat it for Thanksgiving dinner. I'll be honest, when I first heard the idea I thought he was clinically insane, but 11 years of marriage to this man has taught me to never underestimate what he can do if he puts his mind to it. Well, we did it (actually he did it, I went NOWHERE near the bird till we ate him.)

We've tried to teach our kids that we are super blessed to be able to go to the store and buy our food already "prepared," but they know our meat was once a living thing. Because Clay and his dad love to hunt and we do a good bit of fishing the kids have been exposed to what food looks like before it is prepared. We also talk a lot about the importance of appreciating the fact that an animal gave his life so we can eat so we NEVER kill or hurt things just for fun, their always has to be a purpose.....and this year "Phil's" purpose was Thanksgiving dinner.

So, I was a little worried the kids would be scarred, because, like I said, if Clay does something he does it big. He brought the turkey to the campsite ALIVE!! The kids all greeted him when he arrived and I cringed....nothing like naming and befriending something that will be beheaded the next morning. Well, everyone woke early (it was FREEZING so no one slept much) and I look over to see Clay, my brothers and ALL of my children trapsing into the forest with Phil. I told my dad "go get Bailey Kate, I think this may scar her." Dad brings her back to me and she is crying. I said "Oh sweetie, are sad daddy is going to kill Phil?" to which she tearfully replied, "NO! I want to go help." Seriously, this girl is a paradox. She could not be more girly and yet LOVE adventure and dirt and the outdoors more! SO, I let her go into the woods and watch.

Like I said, I went nowhere near the bird. I heard Phil went pretty easily and quickly (with a little blood splatter) and a few minutes later everyone came back to the campsite to clean and gut Phil so we could get cooking. Mind you, no one was crying or upset, they were ready to get to work (I'll admit, I was a little grossed out). Though Clay will try anything, he is always well educated in the task at hand. He spent a lot of time learning how to kill, pluck, gut and prepare a turkey and he did a great job. The kids were all about helping and getting their hands dirty. As Clay was cleaning the turkey the "camp host" informed us that we couldn't use the turkey fryer on the grounds ANYWHERE. That meant taking Phil to the dollar general parking lot a mile down the road to fry him up. Doesn't get more redneck than that in my book! My dad, clay and Adam also shot a compound bow and the adjacent lot while they waited. It was quite a sight!

All the ladies prepared the rest of the meal (my mom did a great job at food prep before so it was a breeze). We all sat down at our picnic table and enjoyed the bounty of our labor. Phil was quite delicious! This Thanksgiving didn't look like the average day for most, but it was perfect for our crazy fam! This year was quite the super fun, freezing, dirty, bloody, tasty, relaxing, adventerous Thanksgiving. I'm so blessed with a beautiful family (on both sides!), a sweet baby on the way, healthy children, more than I could ever need or want and a husband who not only leads this crazy zoo with love and patience, but does it in a way that makes lifelong memories! HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!

                                                                     Getting ready....

The deed has been done...

BK did not leave Clay's side the entire time! 

The finished product!

Frying in the parking lot!

Mashing potatoes old school style!

Uncle Trey snuggles.

Time to EAT!!!!

Nothing better than s'mores by the fire on a cold night.